South Asian Insider
Did you catch your partner lying?
While love just happens, it takes time to ‘build’ trust. Would not it be a wonderful world if we could trust people easily? Or, better still, once the trust is built, if it can never be broken? Between these ‘ifs’ and ‘buts’, we have to admit that trust is as fragile as a dream. So, when we catch the person we love most lying to us, our world comes to a halt. We may cry or keep mum, but the struggle to accept this fact is beyond anyone’s imagination. So how should you deal with such a situation? Here are a few thoughts that you might like to ponder upon:Sometimes we fight to accept the fact that someone we love can lie to us. So, many people take the easy way to deal with it by feigning ignorance. But that’s a big mistake. Acceptance is the first hurdle, after crossing which you will come across the next big hurdle—confrontation. Once you are ready to confront the person, how should you approach the issue? Never use an accusatory tone. Instead of focusing on why your partner lied to you, you should tell the person how the lie had affected you and the relationship.
Doing so would encourage your partner to participate in a constructive conversation because when a couple starts playing the blame game, the guilty will only take a defensive stance. Be patient, listen and then speak.Although it’s difficult to ask direct questions, but the road to discovery, be it anything, is never easy. Don’t beat around the bush. Take a deep breath and ask whatever is troubling your mind. But be prepared that the answers could be very different from what you might be expecting.
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